Spiritual awakening phase is a phase of extreme uncertainty, fear and anxiety, at least this is how I’m experiencing it. You are being stripped out of everything you used to call your identity. You may feel that you don’t know who you are anymore or that you don’t have any control in your life and Law of Attraction doesn’t make things easier.
My spiritual awakening started back in 2012 when I left from a company in a very bad way. I can remember myself consumed with anger and desperation. I wanted to take revenge and find a better paid job to show them that they were wrong to kick me out in a such a way. Anyway, what happened was that no matter how hard I was trying and how many times I’d changed my CV and going to seminars on how to present myself for an interview, I couldn’t find a job, nobody was hiring me. My anger became desperation and my desperation led me to depression. The Law of Attraction was working for me but on the negative way as I was manifesting situations I didn’t like. I’d started becoming extremely anxious about my thoughts and angry because I knew very well that my reality was the manifestation of those thoughts. I couldn’t control my thoughts and the only person to blame was myself.
Law of Attraction in order to work needs you to put out your request and then letting go the need for it to happen. What I was putting out was desperation and neediness and that was exactly what I was attracting. Apart from the negative situations, I had started having strange sensations in my body, flashes, memory loss, weight fluctuations, insomnia, extreme fear lasting for days and then gone. I could see that everything was happening because of the loss of control in my life and the non linear way the situations were manifesting. I’d leant all my life to finish something and then go to the next one which was better and more advanced but now what I was getting instead was situations that were getting me back to the past, beliefs and feelings I thought I had cleared were coming back again. It seemed like I was in a huge negative spiral and I couldn’t get out of it. I was fighting back really hard out of the fear that if I don’t resist enough, I’ll get into worse situations. When the situation couldn’t get any worse I had a breakthrough. I did something I hadn’t done for a long time, I prayed and then I saw light coming down from above washing down all my fears and anxiety. I became a different person after that. Situations didn’t get any better, I was in financial turmoil, my debt was getting bigger and bigger every day but I wasn’t alone. I was never alone, all that was designed for me not against me but for me, to push me become the person I always knew I can be.
I know how hard it can be if the LOA doesn’t work in the way you would like at this time. However, it does something very interesting, it brings in front of you all the feelings/emotions you need to release so you make space for the light to come in, the new you. Don’t try to control your thoughts at this time, just accept that it is a period of your life that you have no control over anything and that you’re manifesting uncomfortable situations. It might get years to start feeling you’re in control again, accept that no matter how hard it sounds. Acceptance is the key.
I’m very interested in the Soul Contracts. If your Soul Contract wants you to experience poverty in this life, then no matter how many positive affirmations you say every day or how many vision boards you’ll have, you won’t see any changes in your life. Why? Because you need to learn the lesson first. How you learn the lesson? It is by going with the flow and flow during the Spiritual Awakening means experiencing negative feelings. Try to understand what is the lesson is behind the poverty feelings, if you can’t find the answer just accept that either it’s not the time to know the answer yet or you many never find it, you just need to learn how to feel happy with little money.
So, just to summarise, going with the flow during spiritual awakening is to experience negative feelings and secondly, what we want may never be manifested. Accept and forgive is the answer.